It's amazing how hearing a song can really take you back. A few weekends ago, on our way out with the boys to Kentucy for my sister in law's wedding, a song played over my MP3 player that I hadn't heard in a long time. It was the song titled, "Beauty From Pain", by SuperChick. Two years ago, this was a song that I played over and over again, crying and praying to God, begging him to show me some form of beauty that was to come from the pain I was experiencing at that time: the pain of unsuccessful tries to get pregnant and the pain of a miscarriage. I was in a very sad place two summers ago.
This is the chorus and some of the lyrics that I had sung over and over as reassurance to myself, and as a prayer:
I wonder why God lets me walk through this place
And though I can't understand why this happened
I know that I will when I look back someday
And see how you've brought beauty from ashes
And made me as gold purified through these flames
After all this has passed, I still will remain
After I've cried my last, there'll be beauty from pain
Though it won't be today, someday I'll hope again
And there'll be beauty from pain
You will bring beauty from my pain
And though I can't understand why this happened
I know that I will when I look back someday
And see how you've brought beauty from ashes
And made me as gold purified through these flames
After all this has passed, I still will remain
After I've cried my last, there'll be beauty from pain
Though it won't be today, someday I'll hope again
And there'll be beauty from pain
You will bring beauty from my pain
I cling to Your promise
There will be a dawn
There will be a dawn
You will bring beauty from my pain
Now, TWO years and TWO boys later (still jaw dropped myself!) I hear this song and cry very thankful, happy tears and think- God, you ARE faithful! When I had NO idea where my pain was leading, You did! You had such a happy ending already laid out for us- an ending I could have never dreamed of! I can now look back and truly say I am thankful for that pain, and thankful for those failed attempts, because if not for them, we would not be the parents of our precious boys.
It is so true!! Without having experienced that pain, we would not be the mama's of these wonderful children. . .I am so with you sistah! God bless and enjoy your time as a mama. I know you are about to head back to work so your time is flying by. Make sure you save a few precious moments each day to savior each boy and to enjoy each one as a special being on this earth. I know you will. God Bless!!
ReplyDeleteI love that when we started running we were running from pain. The days we ran hard were the ones where the sweat mixed with tears and life just hurt. Now when we run fast (ok not slow) and hard it's because our hearts are so light and we laugh and smile the whole way:) Love you BRFF!!!
ReplyDeleteThis is beautiful. I love hearing about how God turns what we consider crap into something magnificent. I feel this will be a great comfort to someone else.
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